Adoption: the Ripple Effect

I remember the day clearly as my husband and I sat in the case worker's office, hearts beating quickly, a bit due to nervousness and much more due to excitement.  The case worker asked us each, "So start by sharing with me, why do you want to adopt a child?"  The answer was complex and filled with God's provision but when she asked, "When did you first know you wanted to adopt?"  we both immediately thought back to a specific moment years before.  

Travis and I were married young, ages 20 and 22 to be exact.  We had very little possessions and lived our first 2 years of marriage off  a meager budget of $800/month. We were poor and in-love and couldn't be happier!  During the early years, there were no extra trips, concerts, vacations or dinners out.  One summer, dear friends invited us on a beach trip and we decided to tag along.  While traveling, we stopped at a restaurant to eat.  Travis and I were waiting outside to be seated and that's when it happened.  I noticed a family of three, Mom, Dad, and daughter outside the restaurant.  All were smiling, talking, enjoying family time but in my mind, time froze still.  I saw that 'lil family and thought, "I would like that one day. How beautiful."  You see, this sweet family did not look alike.  Skin colors didn't match, eye colors were not the same but they very visibly seemed to be joined by love and that spoke to my young heart.  What I didn't know is at the exact same time, my husband noticed this family as well.  He observed them and then leaned in to my ear and whispered, "I'd love that one day."  He didn't put a label to what he saw but we both understood.  In that moment, God ignited a deep desire to build our family through adoption in BOTH of our hearts.  We didn't discuss the details at that time.  Our young minds could not imagine how to support the cost of adoption or the many details that have to be orchestrated to truly bring a family together but instead God planted a seed.  A seed that He would continue to water and feed and grow. 

Fast-forward 12 years to our Knoxville case worker's office.  We shared that story (and many more.....read here) and a huge smile crossed her face as we spoke.  She responded with words that I have never forgotten.  Sweet Lauren said, "Everyone's adoption journey starts somewhere.  But also it starts with someone.  Sharing adoption is like throwing a stone in a pool of water.  One family's journey touches another family's journey.  Then that family affects another and before long you have the ripple effect. "

She asked us if we had any close friends that had adopted or any adoptive families in our church.  We chuckled and replied, No.  We had been strongly impacted by a family twelve years before and we didn't even know their names.  Lauren smiled, laughed and said, "That's okay.  Their adoption story impacted you and now your story will impact others."  In the moment I did not think a lot about her words.  I was too overwhelmed with our journey, our questions, our big decisions to be made.  But in the six years since our youngest son has been home, I have recalled that conversation so many times.  You see, the ripple effect has truly been a beautiful blessing to observe in our lives. Please do not misunderstand me, we do not take any credit for other families' journeys but we do believe God uses people's personal joys and struggles to impact others and give us opportunity to encourage others. 

Ask us now if we have any close friends that have adopted and I just grin BIG with tears in my eyes.  My mind fills with sweet faces that have been deeply touched by adoption.  In the past six years our church family has added five children through the adoption miracle.  We live in a small town and have witnessed so many families built through adoption in the past five years.  SO many that I don't even want to put a number on it.  And God's not done yet.  

Each year, November is National Adoption month.  I did not want this month to pass without encouraging you that if the Lord has placed foster care or adoption on your heart, don't ignore that whisper.  Seek out other families that have walked that road and ask questions.  Check out your local non-profits and agencies that service children in need. There are so many ways you can support orphan care.  Read God's Word and pray about the nudge in your heart.  God creates families in the most unique ways.  I would love to share with you about our individual journey or connect you to other resources. Let's continue to ripple, wherever God plants you.